Clinique Online (ELC)

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Top Five Questions Women Have for Life Coaches

(ARA) - Millions of women often wonder how they can continue to juggle it all or wish they remembered who they “used to be” before having a career, kids or both. Life coaches can help women find their way back to what they really want.

According to MyLifeCompass.com founder and author, Kim Fulcher, four common themes speak to modern women, no matter what life stage they are in. They are:

* Identity – “Who was I before and who am I today?”
* Work Balance – “How do I manage it all and how do I say no?”
* Nurture – “How do I take care of myself physically, spiritually and mentally?”
* Self Worth – “How do I learn to love myself for who I really am and how do I stop feeling guilty?”

Some of the country’s leading life coaching experts from MyLifeCompass.com, an online life coaching community, are now helping women of all ages and walks of life find their passions and, most importantly, reconnect with themselves. Fulcher weighs in on the “top five” most frequently asked questions life coaches hear from their clients:

Question: I’m a mother, a wife, a friend, a sister, a caregiver to my parents and more, but I’ve forgotten who I used to be before I took on all these roles. How do I find the “self” I was long ago? Is she still around?

Answer: Rediscover yourself in baby steps. Get started by scheduling 10 minutes every day to spend a bit of time with yourself. Take time to sit quietly, take a walk, or use a coaching program, like the one offered at www.mylifecompass.com, to ask and answer key questions about who you want to be and what you want in your life.

Question: I never feel like I have any downtime to take care of myself since I’m so busy with work, kids and personal commitments. How do I find the "self" I was before all of this?

Answer: You’ll never “find” time for you; you have to make it. Ask yourself when you can schedule a small amount of time (10 minutes) each day just for you. Then make appointments with yourself, and give those appointments the same level of commitment and respect you would a date with a friend or a scheduled doctor’s appointment.

Question: I’m constantly feeling “mom guilt” since I work outside the home. How do I cope with liking my job, but also wanting to be a good mom?

Answer: You have to stop “shoulding” on yourself. This means you must stop playing the mom game by other people’s rules or your own made up standards and remove the words “should of” from your vocabulary. Ask yourself what kind of mom you want to be, and what kind of example you want to set for your child. The best model for any child involves a happy, healthy, and satisfied mom. If liking your job helps you set this example, it sounds like you’re already a good mom.

Question: I always seem to over-commit. How can I learn to say “no” without feeling like I’m letting someone down?

Answer: Take three steps. First, break your “yes” habit. For the next two weeks, do not accept any invitation or request on the spot. Take 24 hours to consider whether or not you really want or have time to make a commitment. Second, ask yourself why you tend to over-commit. Are you trying to earn love, respect, or friendship? Finally, remember that everyone is busy. While you may fear another person’s anger or disappointment, I’m willing to bet few people will give your decline a second thought.

Question: I used to feel so good about myself both physically and mentally but now I’m overweight and don’t even recognize myself! How do I find my way back to looking and feeling good about me?

Answer: You start by committing to taking care of yourself again. You say you used to feel good about yourself physically and mentally. What were your habits when you were in this place? Did you work out, eat healthy foods or write in a journal? Pick one habit you used to engage in when you liked how you looked and felt, and schedule appointments with yourself every day to recondition this pattern.

For more ways that women can be inspired, empowered and connected, visit www.mylifecompass.com.

Courtesy of ARAcontent

1 comment:

Ruth said...

Wow, these are questions that really hit home. I think I ask myself at least one of them every single day.

One way I found to really cement my own sense of identity was to create my own space at home to be a reflection of who I feel I am. I got the idea from reading Jill Butler's Create the Space You Deserve. She inspired me to make my home a true reflection of who I am.